Secretly (I Love You)
by Obsidianna
Summary: "Very well," the Queen says. "I need you to listen carefully…" And Emma braces herself because nothing has ever prepared her for what she's about to hear.
1. Chapter 1

**Important:**This story is an AU, it takes place in FTL. There is no curse and Cora never killed Daniel so bear that in mind as you read Regina's character development. Since there was no curse, Emma was never sent to our world, so I'm playing a little with those 'what ifs'. Also, Daniels character here is completely different from my real thoughts on him. I made him out that way because it suited my story, that's all. I do apologize in advance if I offend anyone with the liberties I've taken.

Italics stand for past events (except the first paragraphs, those are just an extract from the story). Last but not least, English is not my mother tongue and this is unbeta-ed. Therefore, all pretty typos are mine. Feel free to point out any mistakes I might have made in the comments, I am always willing to improve.

**Secretly (I love you)**

"_What is she doing?"_

"_She's been pacing for the most part of the night."_

"_Yes, I know. I can hear her from across the corridor."_

"_Someone should go inside and see what's going on."_

"_It won't do. She doesn't want to see us, any of us."_

"_Is there anyone who she wants to see?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Who?"_

"_The Queen."_

**I**

There's an incessant banging on the door. At first, it sounds muffled and distant, maybe even as an extension of her own dream but, as the minutes fly by, it gets louder and it resonates closer. She doesn't stir though; she's always been a heavy sleeper. That's probably the reason why the person responsible for the irritable knocking on her wooden door resolves to call for her instead.

"Emma!" A female voice shouts, her knuckles knocking on the door with urgency. "Emma, open up! It's late!"

Emma forces her eyelids to open and immediately shuts them closed again when the bright morning rays hit her squarely on the face. After the initial shock, she opens them again, this time slower and more carefully. She makes sure to blink a few times to adjust herself to the morning light and then gets on her feet, making her way to the door. She unlocks it with one hand and manages to pull it half way open before her best friend pushes past her and storms into the room.

"The Queen has requested your presence," Rosalie turns on her heels to shoot her a pointed look. "And you're running late."

Emma takes a quick glance at her most treasured possession: a clock made of gold, and realizes that she's, in fact, half an hour late. "Shit!" she runs a hand through her short blonde locks in frustration and bends over to pick up her white long-sleeved tunic from the floor. She slept with the tight bandage that hides her breasts on, so she simply puts on her tunic and turns to Rosalie, who is holding her white leather pants out for her and takes them, putting them on so fast that she seems to be jumping in on them.

She slips into her boots easily and, faster than Rosalie could have given her credit for, Emma is dressed and marching towards the Throne Room.

Before Emma can make it there, though, another woman appears from a secondary hall and joins her strides, hers are as purposeful as Emma's; both are obviously in a hurry.

"You're late, child," the old woman reprimands her without averting her eyes from the doors ahead of them.

Emma takes a quick glance at the older woman and realizes that, by the way her eyebrows are knitting together, something isn't quite right.

"How's the Queen today, Gertrude?" she asks, trying to mask the fear that she always feels nagging at the back of her neck whenever the Queen's welfare is concerned.

The old woman waits until her wrinkled palms come into contact with the material of the door before she looks at Emma and replies. "Not good. She's had one of her nightmares again."

Emma absorbs the knowledge in grim silence and waits for the other woman to continue elaborating further. "Have you thought of what you're going to tell her?"

Emma nods. She's been waiting to be summoned by the Queen for nearly a week. She's had plenty of time to go over her words again and again. In fact, she hasn't thought of anything but.

"Good," Gertrude grips the gold handles of the double doors and pushes one slightly open. "Go on now, child."

Emma nods to the woman again and slips into the majestic room. The place is as big as a small village and, even though she has seen it multiple times for the past six years, its grandeur never ceases to amaze her. She notices that today is more crowded than it usually is. There are members of the royalty chatting in low voices in scattered groups, a dozen guards posted at the three different entrances to the room and some of the Queen's advisors talking to the Queen herself.

Emma can't help the small smile that tugs at the corner of her lips when she lifts her eyes and, despite how crowded the Throne Room is, the first person she sees is the only one who she truly has eyes for.

The Queen is sitting in her throne, wearing a black velvet dress that hugs her dreamlike body in all the right places. Her full lips are painted a dark red and her hair is pulled up neatly but there are a few strands purposely left loose. She's the living definition of beauty and grace.

Emma forces herself to tear her gaze away and takes a few steps closer to the Queen who, until this moment, has yet to acknowledge her presence. When she's close enough to be noticed but not enough to be invasive of the Queen's privacy, Emma bows her head in salute and waits in that position until the Queen finishes talking to her advisors.

"That will be all, gentlemen," the Queen waves her hand dismissively and her advisors all bow their heads to her and walk backwards until the Queen breaks away her gaze to look at Emma. "My White Knight," the Queen smiles. "Please, rise."

Emma straightens herself up and slowly lifts her eyes to meet the Queen's. She's still smiling lopsidedly at her and Emma's heart skips a beat at the sight.

"I've been waiting for you," the Queen's eyes travel up and down Emma's body, as if assessing her, and Emma shivers slightly under her scrutiny.

"I know, my Queen," Emma drops herself to one knee and lets her head hang loose in shame. "Please, forgive me."

Long and slender fingers slide under Emma's chin and slowly lift it to eye-level. Emma knows that the Queen is boring her dark eyes into hers but she cannot, for the life of her, bring herself to meet the Queen's gaze. Shame forbids her from it.

"Look at me."

That's a command she cannot refuse, because there is nothing in this world that Emma would ever refuse her.

When their eyes meet, Emma notices just how close to the Queen's face she actually is. Their breaths are almost touching and she can't help but gulp nervously.

"Do you bring news for me?" The Queen's voice is so enthralling and her fingers are still gracing the underside of Emma's chin. She's finding it so hard to stop herself from staring at those luscious lips that she almost forgets that she has to answer.

Emma shakes her head slightly to break the enchantment that this woman puts her on every time they meet. "Yes, my Queen."

The Queen lets her hand drop and she props herself back on her throne, waving for Emma to get on her feet.

"Tell me, dear."

Emma squares her shoulders and finally relaxes because, this, she knows. She has been rehearsing her words for a week and she's certain she won't let the Queen down.

"The enemy's first squadron was surprised by our battalion on the Red Mountains and we managed to reduce their forces by three-quarters, just like you predicted it would happen, my Queen. Captain Jones is leading our forces through the Narrow Pass as we speak and, if everything goes as planned, then we should have Captain Hook's head sooner than what we expected."

"Excellent," the Queen says approvingly and Emma smiles in spite of herself.

"If I may, my Queen, I brought a map of the Narrow Pass and the Tourmaline Shores with me." Emma fishes inside her white vest for the map and shows it to the Queen. When the brunette nods with her head for Emma to proceed, she walks over to a nearby table and waits for the Queen to catch up with her.

When they are both standing before the table, Emma finally unfolds the map with expert hands and spreads it over it.

"Hook's armada is hiding behind these hills," Emma points to a small group of hills on the shore "and our forces are coming through here," this time she points with her finger to the Narrow Pass. "Which leaves Captain Hook with no other option but to leave the protection of their ships and face our forces _before_ we reach the shore. If he's foolish enough to stay, he'll be trapped between the hills and our army. If he decides to face us in battle, then we'll crush him like the pirate bug he is," Emma turns her head over her shoulder to look at the Queen, who was hovering over Emma's shoulder to look at the map so, when she turned, their faces became mere inches apart from each other. Emma clears her throat nervously and goes back to the map. "Our forces triple his. There's no way he can defeat us, my Queen."

Emma watches as the raven beauty turns around on her heels and walks over to her throne.

"I knew I was right when I chose to spare your life," the Queen says as she runs a hand across the top rail of the throne.

The sudden change in topics left Emma confused for a moment, but her mind is quick enough to find the memory that the Queen is referring to before she continues speaking.

"They advised me not to," the Queen's eyes are lost in space, momentarily prisoner of the memory, and Emma makes a good use of this rare moment to contemplate the Queen's raw beauty. "But it wasn't the first time I chose not to pay heed to their words," the Queen turns around to look at Emma in the eyes again "Do you know why I saved your life, Emma?"

Emma shakes her head. She never did know and she most certainly never did ask. She wasn't entitled to. Besides, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to know why the Queen had spared her life all those years ago. In her guilty mind, she knew she should have been left to die on that field. She deserved as much. So why the Queen herself had decided to save her was a mystery that still plagued her dreams. "No, my Queen. I don't."

The Queen sits back on her throne and relaxes into it. "Come closer, dear," she motions with her hand for Emma to pull away from the table and walk closer to her. Emma stops just a few paces away from the throne, wanting to give the Queen her personal space, but the brunette extends her hand toward the blonde and encourages her to move even closer. "When I found you in that… _graveyard_, you were barely alive," the Queen's voice turns serious. "But when I knelt beside you to feel your pulse, you opened your eyes and you looked at me with such ferocity… such _fire_," her eyes close, reliving the memory in her head. "I just couldn't let you die," the Queen opens her eyes again and looks at Emma, who's standing rigid on the spot, trying to absorb the Queen's words and their meaning.

"Her Majesty is merciful."

"Yes," the Queen says to herself, her voice low and velvety. "Yes, she is."

At that exact moment, a man comes bursting into the Throne Room and strides purposely toward them. The Queen's eyes break away from Emma's still figure and land on the intruder.

"Your Majesty," the man bows down to her. "I come bearing news from Lord Daniel."

Emma watches as the Queen's features change dramatically upon hearing that Lord's name being mentioned. She suddenly looks worried and on complete alert and she motions impatiently for the man to draw closer to her.

The Queen fixes her honey brown eyes on the messenger as he comes to an abrupt halt before her. He opens his mouth to speak but, shooting a pointed glance over his shoulder to Emma, he decides against it and shuts it closed again.

The Queen notices this and, without turning her head to acknowledge Emma, she flicks her wrist dismissively at her. "Leave us."

Emma feels a pang of hurt at the cold dismissal but bows down to the Queen nonetheless and walks backwards to the nearest exit door. When her body collides against wood, she finally turns her back to the people inside and swings the door open. Before she crosses to the next room, she glances one last time to the man and the Queen, and Emma can't help feeling extremely curious as to what's being discussed by the two. It doesn't take a genius to know it's fairly important and Emma promises herself she'll find out about this Lord Daniel and the pressing news this messenger brought to the Queen, no matter what.

**II**

"Please, Rose," Emma begs. She knows she's asking for a great deal to her friend. No one employed by the Queen is allowed to divulge the Court's secrets and affairs, but gossip has always been gossip and servants have always been servants. So, she knows that, using the right words or promising the right things, her friend will eventually give in to her.

The dark haired girl seems to ponder on it for a moment and she bites her lip worriedly. "You do know that if this comes out I'll be hanged, right?" Emma nods her head far too eagerly, which earns her a tired sigh from Rosalie. "That devotion you have for the Queen is misplaced, Emma," Rosalie reaches for Emma's arm and her eyes begin to sadden. "She's not who you think you she is."

Emma yanks her arm away from her friend's loose grip and glares openly at her. "She saved my life, Rosalie," Emma walks over to her bedchamber's only window and glances to the courtyard below. "She had every reason to let me die on that field but she chose to save me instead," she turns her head around to look at her friend's sorrowful expression. "So don't you tell me that my devotion for her is misplaced because, if there is anyone in this world who deserves my complete love and respect, is her."

"Very well," Rosalie knows this fight is lost. "I'll tell you everything I know."

Emma crosses the space between them in two large strides and pulls her petite friend into a bone crushing embrace. "Thank you, Rose."

"Don't mention it," Rosalie shrugs away from the embrace to look at Emma in the eyes. "Remember the man that caused so much trouble between the Queen and her mother a few years ago?"

"Yes," Emma narrows her eyes in her effort to remember exactly who he was. "The stable boy."

"That's right. Well, we were all told that he had abandoned the Queen, that – "

"That she was infatuated. That their love wasn't real," Emma finishes impatiently for her.

"Yes," Rosalie walks over to Emma's cot and sits on the edge. "Well, _he_ is Lord Daniel."

"What?" Emma asks, confused. "No, that cannot be." She rakes a hand through her short blonde locks in frustration and sighs. "How is that even possible?"

Rosalie drops down on the mattress and stares at the ceiling. "Apparently, the Queen wasn't infatuated, as we were led to believe. She was _in love_ with him," she makes a long pause before continuing. "She named him Lord and now he's travelling back from whatever land he was hiding in to be with her."

Emma can feel her heart sinking in her chest. She cannot begin to understand why the Queen would want to be with a man who had fled the moment her own mother had made it very clear that he wasn't going to be King. As far as she could comprehend, this Lord Daniel had cared very little for the Queen's love and now that she had named him Lord he was willing to come back?

Emma shakes her head and makes her way to the window again. She peers below and her hand balls into a tight fist when she catches sight of Lord Daniel's party arriving by the main gate. She didn't think he'd be arriving this soon and, for some reason, that irritates her even more than what she already is.

"Shit," she punches the wall next to her, causing Rosalie to jump into a sitting position.

"What's the matter?"

When Emma doesn't reply, Rosalie gets on her feet and walks over to her friend. She places a hand on her shoulder and follows Emma's line of sight with her eyes.

"Is that…?"

"Lord Daniel?" Emma says grimly. "Yes. I believe he is."

**III**

She blocks her attacker's blows with far too much ease. She's particularly focused on training this morning and she's been withstanding from trying the offense so far because she knows that her opponent is not half as good as she is. She would crash him, so Emma just lets him try to land blows on her.

He's panting and sweating profusely already but Emma hasn't even begun to warm up. She thinks of tackling him to the ground just to end the pointless session and teach him a thing or two when she hears a voice she never thought she would hear on the training field.

"…And this is my White Knight," the Queen signals with her hand to Emma as she walks beside Lord Daniel, her hand on his arm.

Both Emma and the man she'd been fighting against freeze in place and contemplate with eyes wide as plates as the Queen and Lord Daniel settle comfortably under the shadow of a willow tree to watch them fight.

"Go on," the Queen waves with her hand, encouraging them to keep on with the sparring session.

Emma stares at her flabbergasted for a moment but she shakes her head to snap out of her reverie and turns back to her sparring companion. She notices that the young knight is as astounded as she is but he manages to pull himself together and get into his combat position.

She doesn't know why, but Emma feels as though she is putting on a show and she wants to impress the Queen, so she grips her sword more firmly between her hands and waits for her opponent to make his first move.

He lunges at her with full force. Apparently, she's not the only one trying to impress the Queen. Emma sidesteps quickly and the knight passes her by, stumbling forward with the force of his own blow. Lord Daniel bursts into laughter and, when the knight steadies himself and turns around to face her once more, his skin is red with shame and his eyes are blazing with fury.

Emma waits for his next attack. He's taking his time, assessing her carefully. He doesn't want to make a fool of himself again and Emma has to admit that, when the attack does come, it takes all of her force to block it. It's one of the times when being a woman in charge of the Queen's knights shows its disadvantages. Especially, when said leader hasn't revealed her true gender to her men. Emma grounds herself as best as she can against the force of his blow and then pushes forward with her sword to break their contact.

He staggers back a few steps, panting heavily. Emma stays in her position, seizing him up. He charges at her again, this time aiming for her legs. Emma jumps up and avoids his blow. When she lands steadily on the ground again, she notices that he's leaving himself out in the open and makes a good use of this moment to strike.

She hits him with the pommel and the force of her blow knocks the wind out of him. Emma grips the hilt more tightly between her hands and she's about to land her final blow on him when she catches sight of the Queen out of the corner of her eyes. Lord Daniel is helping her to her feet and whispering something in her ear that makes her beam at him.

Emma is so absorbed by the exchange that she doesn't see the knight coming until she feels the edge of his blade cutting through her skin. She hisses in pain, her hand automatically covering the wound on her upper arm. Before she has time to register anything else but the blood oozing from the gash, she's swept off her feet and lands heavily on the dirt. She gasps and turns on her side, trying to catch her breath. Her eyes lock on the Queen's for a split second and what she sees in those eyes makes her feel stripped to the bone.

The sharpness of the sword's pointy end on her skin breaks her out of her absorption and she turns around to face the knight.

"Yield!" he tucks the point under her chin and, when she doesn't give him an answer, he presses down harder on her skin, piercing just slightly.

"I yield," she grits out, feeling the sting of tears forming in her eyes, though it has little to do with the fact that she just lost the match.

The young knight holds out his hand to help her up and Emma accepts it reluctantly. He's beaming at her and not in vain, he just beat his leader. But she doesn't pay him attention. Her eyes seek out the Queen's again, but she's turned her back on her and she's currently being led away by Lord Daniel. Emma follows her with her eyes until the knight slaps her shoulder playfully and she has to tear her gaze away.

"Congratulations," Emma smiles half heartedly at him and walks past him, silently declaring the training session over.

**IV**

"You need to eat something," Rosalie pushes the plate closer to her and gives her a concerned look.

Emma eyes the food on the plate, mashed potatoes and pumpkin, purses her lips and pushes the plate away again. She cannot manage a spoonful even if she wanted.

"You should have been there, Rose," Emma says and shakes her head disapprovingly. "The way she looked at me…" she pauses for a second, reliving the memory in her head. "She had never come down to watch us train before, never, and now she does, with that pompous arrogant fiancé of hers and I end up flat on my back," Emma looks up to meet Rosalie's sad blue eyes. "I had never lost a match before. That's why she liked me so much. That's why she named me leader of the knights, even when I'm a girl," she sighs heavily and feels a lump form in her throat, constricting her words. "I swore I'd never let her down and I did, right in front of her."

Rosalie reaches out and squeezes her arm comfortingly. "Don't be so hard on yourself, Em. It was just a sparring session," she uses her free hand to push Emma's plate close to her again. "Now eat. A malnourished knight is useless to the Queen. So, if you want her favor, you'll eat."

Emma lets out a puff of air and grabs her fork begrudgingly. She is about to take a mouthful of her food into her mouth when a servant enters the kitchen, calling her by her title.

"Sir Swan!"

Emma spins around to see who's calling for her and she sees it's probably one of the new hired servants because she doesn't recognize him.

"Yes?"

The dark haired servant strides a little too nervously toward her and comes to a halt in front of her.

"The Queen requests your presence in her royal chambers," he says in a rush, clearly out of breath.

Emma turns her head over her shoulder to look at Rosalie, who mirrors her confused look. She deposits the fork back on the table and gets on her feet.

"Lead the way," she motions with her hand to the exit door and the boy nods at her, turning his back on her and heading back to the Queen's bedchamber.

Emma has never been on the Queen's personal chambers before so, when she gets there, she immediately notices how her heart starts beating frantically in her chest. What the Queen could possibly want from her in her bedchambers is beyond her, but she has to admit she's a little hopeful as to what it may be.

The young servant knocks on the door and, about a minute later, a blonde haired serving girl opens it a little and peeks through the lid.

"The Queen has requested sir Swan's presence," the boy says to the blonde maid and she gives Emma a weary look.

After a few seconds, she opens the door wider and moves to the side to grant her entrance. Emma steps inside and feels rather than sees the door being closed at her back. She gulps when she turns around and sees that both the maid and the boy are gone.

"My White Knight," the Queen's velvety voice breaks the tense silence that had befallen in the room. "Come closer, dear. I want to see you."

Emma walks further into the room, until she spots the Queen lying comfortably on her King Size bed. She has her back against the headboard, softly supported by some plush pillows.

"My Queen," Emma bows her head to the Queen, who eyes her curiously from her position on the bed. "Your requested my presence?"

"I did."

Emma shifts on her feet uncomfortably. She's alone in the Queen's bedchamber and the Queen is eyeing her like a panther would to its prey. Even though she's thrilled to be alone in company of this raven beauty, she has to admit that it is also rather unnerving. The Queen can be so intimidating with all that raw beauty and air of superiority that surrounds her all the time. Emma has never felt so tiny and insignificant in her life before this moment.

"What can I do for you, my Queen?"

The brunette pats the bed with her hand, inviting her to take seat beside her. "You are always so eager to please," the Queen rewards her with a dazzling smile as Emma takes seat at the other edge of the bed. "That was always what I liked most about you."

Emma is caught off guard by the Queen's open admission and, for a few seconds she's left speechless. She has to shake her head and remind herself that she has to answer. "Thank you, my Queen. You are too kind."

"Regina," the dark haired beauty searches for her green eyes and smiles lopsidedly at her. "Call me Regina."

"But, my Queen-" Emma begins to protest but Regina places one long slender finger against her lips, silencing her.

"That's an order."

Emma nods dimly with her head and Regina's finger slides against her lips as a result, causing Emma to close her eyes involuntarily and enjoy the subtle caress.

After what seems like an eternity, Regina retrieves her finger and uses her hand to grip Emma's upper arm. She twists her arm around softly and Emma opens her eyes to find the Queen examining her wound with furrowed eyebrows and concerned eyes.

"You're hurt," she states and graces the gash with her fingertips.

Emma winces a little and Regina shakes her head disapprovingly. She places her free hand on top of the wound, covering it, and Emma closes her eyes.

She feels a tingling sensation moving up her spine. It's not unpleasant at all, it feels like a summer breeze, caressing her skin with the softness of a lover and spreading warmth along her skin.

"There," Regina removes both her hands from Emma's arm and sits back on the bed, contemplating her handiwork approvingly. "Much better."

Emma gazes down to her arm and only sees her shirt gashed open and bloodied where her wound was just a moment ago. She gasps in awe and looks up at Regina, smiling as bright as sunshine. "Thank you, my - Regina."

The Queen smiles indulgently at Emma but, as soon as the smile appears, it fades and Regina's usually stoic face clouds with worry.

Emma notices the change both in the Queen's expression but, also, in the air. The light atmosphere that she had been enjoying until then suddenly turned heavy and tense. Something was wrong.

"Is there something troubling you, my Queen?"

Regina lifts up her head to look at Emma with troubled eyes and a sad smile.

"My White Knight," the Queen whispers tenderly and reaches out with her hand to cup Emma's cheek.

All Emma wants is to take Regina's hand in hers and entwine their fingers, touch her soft skin, kiss it with her lips, _anything_ that can show just how devoted she is to her, how much she loves her. But she cannot. It doesn't matter how much of a knight she is, the Queen is the Queen and Emma is and, will always be, below her standard. She cannot initiate anything, unless the Queen does it herself or asks for it. So all Emma can do is lean in to the touch ever so slightly and close her eyes, wishing with every ounce of her being that this moment never end.

Unfortunately for her, Regina pulls away far too quickly and slides down from the mattress, leaving Emma alone in the bed and missing the warmth and feeling of perfect soft skin against her own.

When Emma opens her eyes again, Regina is standing in front of the window and she's gazing to the horizon, seemingly lost deep in thought. The blonde hops off the bed and approaches the Queen with carefully measured steps, not wanting to disturb her. However silent she is, Regina seems to sense her presence at her back and she turns her head around to look at her.

"I know of your devotion for me," Regina says brokenly and it frightens Emma to see just how smaller she seems at this moment. "I know I can confide anything in you and you will not betray me," the Queen turns around fully to face her and she takes both Emma's hands in hers. "What I'm about to tell you has to stay between us. No one can know about this," Regina fixes her steely hazel eyes into hers. "Can I trust you, Emma?"

"Yes, my Queen," Emma swears. There's nothing she can ever refuse to this woman. She knows she would go to the very same gates of the Underworld if she ever asked her to.

Regina seems pleased with her answer and smiles gratefully at her. "Very well," the Queen says. "I need you to listen carefully…" And Emma braces herself because nothing has ever prepared her for what she's about to hear.

**A/N: Alrighty, so there it is. First chapter completed. This is a two parter, so the best is yet to come. Do let me know your thoughts on the story so far! Reviews make me update faster.**


	2. Chapter 2

_The sky is painted a dark red that is slowly turning into purple, as the last vestiges of day give in to the night. The smell of rust and death surrounding them is so strong that she would throw up by a mere inhalation if only she had anything else to vomit. _

_She can feel the bitter taste of blood in her mouth and she swallows eagerly, desperate to quench the thirst that is threatening to drive her insane. Everything hurts, every muscle, every bone, every ending of her joints. She's no expert but, by how hard and painful the task of breathing has become, she's sure that she has, at least, a few broken ribs. She also knows that the blood in her mouth is a clear indication that she has a vital organ pierced internally, but she's past the pain already. She's just lying there, waiting for death to come and claim her tortured soul once and for all._

_Her eyes are closed, accompanying her knitted eyebrows, and her lips are pursed into a thin line. She just wants it all to be over. She's tired of waiting, of hearing how her brothers at arms scream in pain, how they beg for mercy that won't be shown to them, not today, not ever. So, when she feels a cool hand on her feverish skin, she lets out a long relieved breath. Death has come._

"_Open your eyes, dear."_

_She never knew Death could speak, or that it would have the voice of a woman, but nothing really matters anymore. She opens her eyes slowly and her green, bleary orbs meet sparkly hazel ones. And maybe it's because she's delirious from the blood loss but the first thing she thinks is just how beautiful Death is. _

"_What's your name?"_

"_E-Emma," she blurts through gritted teeth and a tendril of blood seeps from her mouth._

"_Emma," the velvety voice repeats, trying the name in her mouth. "It seems today is your lucky day, Emma." _

_And before Emma has time to reply, the same cool hand covers her sweat-prickled forehead and a warm sensation spreads throughout her body, tickling her, caressing her. She starts to feel better almost immediately. Her breathing ensues and she can almost feel how her dislocated limbs snap back into place and how her broken ribs mend, one by one._

_When that sweet sensation subsides, Emma feels renewed and invigorated. She finds it hard to believe that, a second ago, she was welcoming death with open arms. _

_She opens her sea green eyes and finds those beautiful hazel orbs gazing back at her._

"_How do you feel, dear?"_

_Emma is surprised to realize that she isn't staring into Death's eyes but those of a woman, a beautiful dark haired woman with the most deep and enthralling voice she's ever heard. _

"_Like brand new," she replies, unable to tear her gaze away from the brunette's eyes. "Thank you…"_

"_Regina," the woman finishes for her and smiles politely._

_Then, the dark haired beauty gets on her feet and Emma finally realizes what the other woman is wearing. She's dressed in black and silvery armor, from head to toes. Her hair is tied back into a bun and in her head rests a crown. _

_Emma feels how her arms, that are supporting her, give way and she flops back onto the ground, shocked by her discovery. _

"_**Queen**__ Regina," Emma murmurs almost inaudibly, suddenly unable to meet the dark haired beauty in the eyes again. "But… why?" _

"_Like I said, dear," the Queen gestures with her hand for a foot soldier to bring her horse "must be your lucky day." _

_The soldier holds the Queen's black horse's reigns as she mounts it with expertise. When she's properly sitting on the saddle, she turns her head back over her shoulder to look at Emma one last time and then she kicks the animal, urging it into a throttle._

"_Wait!" Emma jumps to her feet and runs as close to the Queen as her knights allow her to get. "You saved my life," her hopeful green eyes seek Regina's and lock with intensity. "I'm forever in your debt," Emma attempts to walk a few steps closer to the Queen but the knights block her way with their swords. It's Regina herself who waves her hand in a silent command for her knights to put their weapons down and allows Emma to draw nearer. "Let me try to do something to repay that debt."_

_Regina eyes her with both curiosity and disdain. Her calm face has turned into a rigid mask and her kind hazel eyes seem to be closer to pitch black._

"_And what could you possibly have to offer me?" she spits almost angrily but it doesn't intimidate Emma at all. Instead and, much to the Queen's surprise, she steps even closer until she comes to a halt in front of the horse._

"_Anything you ask of me."_

**II**

Emma is staring out the window, lost deep in thought. She's been sitting on the window's sill doing nothing for the most part of this day and the day before. She cannot get Regina's words out of her head, no matter how much she tries.

"Emma?" Rosalie's voice asks tentatively as she places a hand on the younger woman's arm.

Although she feels her friend's presence behind her, the blonde doesn't turn to look at her. Her eyes remain fixed on the horizon line.

Rosalie sighs heavily. "Are you going to tell me what's going on in that head of yours?" she waits for a full minute but, when Emma doesn't answer, her patience begins to waver. "By the gods Emma, you're such a mystery!" Rosalie throws her hands up in the air in frustration, but at least she finally seems to draw a response from the blonde.

Emma climbs down from the window's sill to face her fuming friend. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that we've been friends for six years and I don't know anything about you, Emma."

"That's – That's not true, Rose." she furrows her eyebrows together in confusion. "You do know things about me."

Rosalie glares at her and begins to pace around the room. "I know your name is Emma," she begins to count the facts with her fingers to stress her point. "I know the Queen saved your life once and that you feel forever indebted to her. I know that you came from another Kingdom and that your favorite foods all involve a non healthy amount of grease and sugar," she stops pacing and holds up her hand in front of Emma's eyes. "Four things. That's all I know about you, Emma."

The blonde snorts and shakes her head. "You know far more than that, Rose."

"Really?" Rosalie asks, glowering. "Who are your parents, Emma? Are they even alive? Where do you come from? Who were you fighting for on that field when the Queen found you?" Emma stares at her dumbfounded. She opens her mouth to answer but closes it again a second after. She repeats the action twice more until Rosalie lets out a puff of air in indignation and shoots daggers at her. "That's what I thought," she says and turns around, practically stomping towards the door.

"Something bad is going to happen, Rose."

Rosalie stops abruptly and turns around slowly to look at her friend. Emma has her back against the stone wall and her gaze is fixed on the floor.

"I promised the Queen I wouldn't tell," she raises her eyes to meet Rosalie's and gives her a pleading look, "but something really bad is coming."

Rosalie walks over to where Emma is standing and mirrors her position, her back resting against the cool stone. "I don't think the Queen is who you think she is, Em, but I do know that she knighted you for a reason."

"What reason is that?"

"She trusts you," Rosalie says simply, a smile adorning her pale features.

"You make it sound so simple, Rose," Emma lets her head slump back against the wall and sighs.

"It _is_ simple, Emma," she presses, grabbing the blonde by the hand and forcing her to meet her eyes. "Whatever it is that you say is going to happen, the Queen trusts you to stop it and you will, just like you always have." Rosalie gives her an affectionate squeeze and bumps Emma's shoulder to lift her spirits a little.

"I hope you're right, Rose," Emma says somberly. "I hope you're right."

**III**

She's been going over the details for days now and she's sure that the plan she's come up with is going to work. She just needs to convince Regina of it now.

Emma climbs the last flight of steps that take to the Queen's chambers in a rush. She's in such a hurry to get to the Queen's bedchambers to inform Regina of her plan that she almost misses the two people arguing heatedly inside. She stops dead in her tracks when she hears the Queen's voice reverberate through the hall.

"…Daniel, listen to me."

Emma presses herself flat against the stone wall and trains her ears to listen more carefully. She knows she shouldn't be eavesdropping on the Queen but she cannot help it.

"What else is there to say, Regina?" Daniel asks, clearly on edge. "I don't know how Cora found out about us again but, if what you say is true, then this is the end for us."

"No, please don't say that."

Emma's heart clenches painfully in her chest upon hearing the Queen's usually confident voice break like that.

"Daniel, please. I am working on it. My White Knight is - "

"That _girl_!" Daniel interrupts her angrily. "She's merely a child, Regina! How can you be so foolish?"

"She can be trusted, Daniel. She has never failed me."

"Need I remind you that your _precious_ White Knight was fighting against you, Regina?" He asks, spitting out the word 'precious' as if it was the most disgusting thing for him to say. "When you decided to play merciful Queen that day, did you know she was the enemy… y_our_ enemy?" Daniel snaps angrily. He's clearly running out of patience. "I don't know how you can place your trust in that girl, Regina. She was a foot soldier, a commoner, a _miss nobody_," Emma has to bite her lip to repress the urge to burst into the room and beat the hell out of that jackass. "What did she do to gain your trust, eh?" Daniel asks but Regina doesn't reply, so he presses on. "Did she lick your boots clean? Or maybe you allowed her to warm your bed while I was gone."

_SLAP_.

"Bitch!" Daniel yells, completely ireful. "I'll make you pay for that."

That was it. Emma had had enough. She bursts into the room without preamble, causing the two figures inside to stop dead in their tracks and look at her. Daniel freezes on the spot with his hand up in the air, about to hit Regina.

"You touch her and you'll be sorry," Emma spits through gritted teeth and the ferocity in her voice surprises all three of them.

Daniel seems to recover first though. "And who do the hell do you think you are?" His words are seeped with poison and an underlying disgust for her that only seem to fuel her anger even further.

She steps closer to him, closing the distance between their bodies until their breaths almost touch. "A _miss nobody_ that's gonna rip your insides out if you ever raise a hand to the Queen again."

Lord Daniel's face turns red with fury and his hands ball into fists. He looks like he's about to lose it and Emma steels herself on the spot. She holds his gaze steadily, silently defying him to make the first move. It's a trap and Emma is waiting for him to fall for it. He might be a Lord, he might be a man and older than her but she's knight commander and has years on the field and training ground that make her almost an expert when it comes to combat and fighting skills. He doesn't stand a chance against her and he knows it.

"You'll regret this," he threats and passes her by, bumping his shoulder against hers with as much force as he can muster and then storms out of the room.

Emma waits until she hears Lord Daniel's furious steps descending the staircase and then crosses the distance between the astonished Queen and her.

"Are you alright?" she asks, lifting a hand to cup Regina's cheek. She freezes when she realizes what she was about to do and her hand falls back to her side.

Regina gives her a shaky look and, for a moment there, Emma sees not the Queen but the _woman_ inside of her that she has to carefully hide behind stoic masks and hard looks. It lasts but a fleeting moment and then it's gone, replaced once more by the familiar look of the imposing and impenetrable presence of the queen.

"You shouldn't have done that."

Emma has to blink a few times because she cannot believe what she just heard. "What?"

"I believe you heard me just fine, dear." the Queen says and gives Emma a hard look, filled with reprove.

"He was about to hit you!"

"Lord Daniel was merely reacting to my physical provocation," Regina turns her back on Emma and walks over to a chair. She lets herself fall on it and sighs heavily. "I slapped him."

Emma follows her across the room and stops just a meter away from her. "Yes, I know but he - "

The Queen snaps her head up and looks at Emma with fury swirling in her dark orbs. "You were eavesdropping on us?"

Emma has to look away from the Queen's eyes because she cannot bare the look of utter confusion and anger she's giving her. "Yes, I was," she admits almost inaudibly and Regina's mouth parts at the confession. "But I didn't mean to. I - "

"Stop."

"No, Regina. Listen," Emma drops to her knees in front of her, begging her to hear her out. "I was coming here to tell you what I've planned to stop Cora but then I heard you arguing and - "

"I said stop."

"Please, Regina. Let me explain."

"No," Regina stands abruptly from the chair, towering over Emma. "I've heard enough. Apparently, Lord Daniel was right. You _can't_ be trusted."

"What?" fear rises in her gut. "No, that's not true. I _can_ be trusted," Emma blurts out because the lump forming in her throat is threatening to leave her without the ability to speak. "You can trust me, Regina. You know you can."

Regina gives her a distasteful look and then her legs brush past her kneeling body, leaving Emma to stare at an empty chair. "I am so disappointed in you, Emma. I thought you were different."

"I am!" she's desperate now. She turns around, still on her knees, to look at Regina in the eyes. "You know I am," Emma whispers brokenly as tears begin to form in her eyes.

Regina sees the tears there and she averts her eyes by turning her head to the side. "Leave."

"Don't do this," tears stream down her face as her heart seems to constrict painfully in her chest. "Please, Regina."

"LEAVE!" Regina yells so loudly and with so much hatred that Emma feels herself shrink under her hard stare.

She slowly comes to her feet, though she's shaking so much that she fears she's going to fall back on her knees again. By sheer determination, Emma manages to stand on her wobbly and trembling limbs. She straightens up as much as she can but her shoulders remain slumped and her head cast low. She feels her world crumbling down and she is not sure how she hasn't thrown herself at the Queen's feet and begged for mercy yet. It's probably the knowledge that it would only make matters worse what stops her from actually trying. Instead, she forces herself to give the first step forward and then the second, until she's half walking-half dragging herself toward the door. Her hand closes on the handle when a voice stops her. Emma feels how her hopes rise in her chest only to be crashed again.

"And it's _Queen_ Regina to you."

**IV**

"What is she doing?"

Rosalie turns her head over her shoulder to look at the old woman approaching her. "She's been pacing for the most part of the night."

The woman nods with her head and points with her finger to Emma's bedroom door. "Yes, I know. I can hear her from across the corridor."

"Someone should go inside and see what's going on," Thomas, a young page, adds nervously.

Rosalie shakes her head. "It won't do. She doesn't want to see us, any of us."

The old woman steps in front of the door, listening to Emma scream furiously and stomp across the tiny room. "Is there anyone who she wants to see?"

"Yes." Rosalie replies, eyes fixed on the wooden door.

The old woman turns back to look at the petite brunette with hope shining anew in her eyes. "Who?"

Rosalie sighs heavily and gives the closed door one last sad glance. "The Queen."

**V**

_The double doors open ajar and the two knights that are escorting her push her forward and into the Throne Room. Emma lifts her head up and the first thing she sees is two hazel eyes staring straight at hers. _

_The Queen is wearing a red dress with silver embroidery and she looks so astoundingly beautiful that Emma has to remind herself how to breathe for a moment. Her own simple white garments make Emma look incredibly plain and common in comparison to this sophisticated raven beauty._

_The enchantment breaks when one of her escorts pushes her by the shoulder again and she's forced to move forward. They make her stop a few meters from the dais, where the Queen is sitting comfortably in her throne._

"_We've brought the traitor, Your Majesty," the knight standing at her right announces and Emma can feel fire burning in the pit of her stomach at being called a traitor._

_She's never let anyone step over her and she's not going to allow these idiots to start now. "I'm not a trait-" she protests but she's cut off abruptly when the same knight backhands her hard on the face._

_Emma covers her now pulsing cheek with her hand and lifts her head high and defiantly again. One slap is not going to break her. Her green eyes lock on the Queen's and she almost gasps at what she sees there. Regina is eying her with such undiluted intensity and fascination that Emma feels like a rare jewel on display, waiting to be sold to the highest bidder and, of course, Regina __**is**__ the highest bidder._

"_Emma, wasn't it?" the Queen asks, directing her complete attention solely to her._

_Emma feels the intense need to root herself to the ground because, she now knows, this woman has the ability to reduce her to an insignificant and small creature every time she addresses her. It's like she has the power to vanish everything and everyone surrounding them and place Emma under a spotlight, where she eyes her like a predator would its prey. _

"_Yes."_

"_Yes, __**Your Majesty**__." the knight standing at her left corrects her._

"_Yes, __**Your Highness**__." Emma repeats, though she changes the title on purpose._

_Once again Regina gives her a predatory look and then smirks, which gives Emma the impression that the Queen likes the fact that she doesn't play by the rules. Suddenly, the Queen stands up and waves her hand dismissively to the guards at Emma's sides._

"_Leave us."_

_Both knights bow down their heads to her and then turn around, marching toward the double doors in utter silence._

"_Apologies for the way my knights have treated you," the Queen says as she descends the few steps from the dais and begins to walk closer to the blonde. _

_Emma shakes her head. "There's no need."_

_Regina comes to a halt in front of her and eyes her up and down as if she was scanning her thoroughly. "What should I do with you, Emma?" the Queen asks her with a mixture of both curiosity and seriousness in her tone._

_At first, Emma thinks the Queen is just asking the question rhetorically but, when the brunette arches her eyebrow suggestively, Emma realizes that Regina had just, in fact, asked for her opinion._

"_I - Uhm…" she stammers, shocked that anyone, much less the Queen, would ask for her sincere opinion on a subject._

"_Well?" Regina presses, though the way her lips curve upwards tell Emma that she's rather amused by her sudden loss of words._

"_I think you should knight me," Emma says too fast and without thinking. _

_When the blonde realizes what she's just said, she takes a hand to her mouth and covers it. She notices then that Regina looks just as flabbergasted as she does, but the Queen recovers faster and Emma has to give her a lot of credit for that. _

_In any other Kingdom she would have lost her head by now._

"_Knight you…" Regina repeats aloud as she begins to circle Emma. "You think I should knight you." Emma can feel the Queen's presence behind her and her heart starts to hammer in her chest. "It's an interesting choice, dear, given the fact that you actually murdered my Knight Commander on the battle ground," Regina's voice sounds so close to her that, for a split second, Emma is sure that the Queen is whispering the words in her ear. "But you say you are indebted to me and that you want to pay that debt," the blonde nods dimly with her head. "Then who am I to keep you from doing so?" Regina finally comes to stand before her again and she's wearing a lopsided smile that Emma can't quite interpret. "If a knight is what you want to be, then a knight it is what you shall become." _

_Emma can't contain the smile that tugs at her lips and the enormous sense of relief and happiness that invades her. "Thank you, Your Highness."_

"_But," Regina lifts a finger to silence her. "That's not all. Since you killed my Knight Commander there's now a vacant place in my personal guard for you to fill in. I've seen you fight and I know you will not disappoint me. I am confident you will make a fine Commander."_

"_Then what's the prob-"_

"_The __**issue**__ is that you are a woman, dear," the Queen says and Emma suddenly feels like she's being lectured somehow. "And the fact that you were fighting for the __**wrong**__ Queen won't give you any extra points here," Emma bites her lip nervously upon hearing this. She's always had it hard in her life but, somehow, she's never wanted to be part of something as much as she wants to be Queen Regina's knight now. "So, if you really want to serve me and be knighted you'll have to make a few sacrifices," Regina penetrates her with her steely dark eyes, trying to draw out an answer from them but Emma's eyes are impossible to read, which is yet another thing that intrigues her about the younger woman._

_If Regina is honest with herself, she has to admit she's rather waiting for the blonde to give her her thanks and run the other way –Not that she would allow her to leave though but still – However, Emma doesn't seem concerned about these 'sacrifices' in the slightest._

"_I'm all ears." she says, lifting her chin and mentally preparing herself for whatever the Queen throws at her. _

_The brunette smirks. Emma has given her the answer she wasn't expecting yet again. This woman really is full of surprises. However, her boldness and the way she breaks rules screams trouble all the way from here to the Underworld. _

_Yet, there is something about her…_

"_Well, in order to deceive men you would have to pretend to be one. Therefore, I would require you to cut your hair and dress like one," Regina says, voice devoid of emotion. _

"_That sounds easy enough."_

_The Queen narrows her eyes and looks at her, trying to discern whether she's lying or not. What she doesn't know is that Emma has never been so truthful in her life before._

"_You were serious when you said you'd do anything I asked of you, weren't you?" Regina asks in a low voice and, just for that fraction of time, her stoic mask falls and Emma gets to see the first glimpse of the woman trapped inside the queen._

"_Yes, I was." Emma replies, trying to portray just how honest she's being and how much she means it with a single look at the Queen's dark eyes._

_Apparently, Regina sees it because she nods once with her head and straightens herself up. "Very well then," she turns around and sits in her throne. "You're dismissed."_

_A pang of sadness invades her at being dismissed without achieving her objective but Emma turns around the same and begins to walk toward the exit doors._

_When she's halfway there, Regina's voice stops her and Emma turns around to look at her again. "The ceremony will take place tomorrow at dusk," Emma nods vigorously, trying to contain her happiness. "I expect you to be there on time… My White Knight."_

_Emma bows down with her head to show her respect to Regina and makes a good use of this moment to hide the smile that appears on her face upon hearing the Queen call her by that title._

"_Thank you, My Queen."_

**VI**

This time she makes sure to make a show out of climbing the stairs that lead to the Queen's chambers, practically stomping her way in. Yet it seems Emma is destined to overhear things she is not meant to.

"…I really care about you, Daniel," The Queen whispers against Lord Daniel's chest. She has her hands behind his shoulders and she's gripping him as if for dear life. Emma has certainly never seen Regina look so vulnerable before. "But, with Cora, that makes you my weakness." She breaks out of his loose embrace to lock eyes with him. "You must leave," Regina says, her voice faltering at the last bit and it makes Emma's heart swell in her chest. "If you love me, you'll leave."

Lord Daniel glances down at the woman he's holding in his arms and he seems to ponder on her words for a long minute. Emma knows the answer he has to give her, it's at the very tip of her tongue, dying to be said aloud but it's not her place to do so, it's Lord Daniel's.

"I see now that there is no other way," Daniel says, taking Regina by the arm and leading her to a nearby sofa. "I will leave."

Emma shakes her head and silently curses him with all that she is as she watches Regina's heart break right before her eyes. It is not the answer she was looking for, even if she made it seem like it was.

Lord Daniel isn't a Lord, he never was and he will never be. He is a stable boy and stable boys could never understand the games Kings and Queens have to play. But Emma does and she's learnt to read Regina's little expressions along the years she's shared with her. That's why she knows that, behind that inexorable mask, there's a woman who has just been betrayed by the person she jeopardized everything for and who is now hurting beyond words.

Regina straightens herself on the sofa and forces herself to remain as stoic and unreadable as ever, but Emma can see right through her. The Queen takes Lord Daniel's hand in hers and bores her eyes into his.

"If you love me…"

Emma takes an involuntary step forward as she sees rather than hears how Regina's voice breaks and is unable to complete her sentence.

Lord Daniel remains as oblivious as ever, whether he is doing it on purpose or not, Emma cannot be sure anymore. What she does know is that it takes a blind man not to see just how badly Regina is hurting.

"I know," Daniel says, his voice steady and his eyes purposeful. "I will leave at once." He leans in and captures Regina's lips in a chaste kiss that ends too soon to mean anything at all. "I love you, Regina." he caresses her cheek momentarily and brushes past her, tousling her perfectly combed raven hair with his sleeve at the sudden movement.

Regina doesn't turn around to watch him leave but Emma fixes her blazing green eyes on him as he approaches her and she swears that, if this excuse of a man wasn't Regina's lover, she would have killed him by now. No one gets to treat a lady like that, much less a woman like Regina.

Lord Daniel stops before her and gives her a hard look. "Move aside," he spats and Emma eyes him up and down with distaste, but she does as he says and allows him to rat out.

"Idiot," Emma murmurs to herself as she watches him descend the stairs.

When his silhouette disappears, Emma turns around and walks further into the Queen's chambers. She immediately notices how the brunette's shoulders sag and she knows that the Queen is crying. In all the years that she has known Regina, Emma has never seen her cry before. She bites down on her lip hard to stop herself from chasing that arrogant prick down the stairs and beating him to a pulp. Instead, she kneels down on the floor beside Regina and waits until the Queen addresses her or gives her permission to speak.

The Queen swallows audibly and blinks the tears away. A lifetime of hiding her emotions allows her to do it with expertise and, when she lifts her head to meet Emma's eyes, the only trace that she'd been crying a second ago are her red rimmed eyes.

"My White Knight," Regina whispers brokenly as new tears begin to well up in her eyes. Again, she blinks them away.

"My Queen," Emma whispers back reverently and Regina smiles at her.

However, the brunette's smile falters and is replaced by a look of pure anger. Emma's heart constricts at knowing that Regina had, for a fraction of a second, forgotten about her betrayal. Maybe years of companionship and secret affection can trick one's mind the way Regina's had just been tricked. Emma lets out a heavy breath and sits back on her heels.

"Do you know why I summoned you, Emma?"

"No, I don't."

"Like I told you a week ago, my mother Cora found out about Daniel and me," the Queen gets on her feet and walks past Emma's kneeling form on the floor. "She swore to kill anyone I love so he has to leave," Regina closes her eyes and sighs. "Again."

Emma watches her walk over to a big wooden closet and search for something inside.

"I need your help, Emma," Regina retrieves a black tunic with matching pants from the wardrobe and walks over to the sofa again. She kneels on the floor in front of Emma and sets the garments aside to take Emma's hands in hers. "I know you would do anything for me."

Emma has a bad feeling about this. Maybe it's the way the brunette is looking at her, maybe it's the desperation in her voice, but she swallows it down and nods the same. There's nothing in this world that Emma could deny her anyway. Whatever Regina asks of her, Emma will always stay true to her word.

"There's a carriage waiting outside the castle. It will take Lord Daniel to a safe place," Regina says in a low voice, piercing Emma's green eyes with her dark hazel ones. "And I want you in it too."

Emma takes her hands out of the Queen's grasp and her mouth falls agape in astonishment. Her head starts to spin dangerously and she takes a hand to her temple to steady herself. She cannot believe her ears. Regina is asking her to leave the castle, to leave her life, to leave _her_, forever.

"These are Lord Daniel's clothes," Regina continues, ignoring Emma's shock completely. "In case Cora's men stop your carriage." The Queen hands the folded clothes to Emma, who takes them in her trembling hands.

"I don't – I don't understand."

"You'll be wearing Lord Daniel's clothes, dear." Regina says. "Should the carriage be stopped, you'll pretend to be Daniel and he'll pretend to be you," the Queen gives her a steely glance, her inexorable and cold mask back on. "It's the only way to ensure his safety."

Emma feels like she's just been slapped hard in the face. She's frozen on the spot, holding Lord Daniel's clothes in her arms, her gaze lost in some insignificant spot on the wall. After all these years…

"Is this my punishment?" Emma whispers, breaking out of her absorption to look at Regina's glassy eyes. "I betrayed your trust, so you punish me?" and then she sees it, Regina's dark eyes sparkle and Emma finally understands. "I see," she says to herself and walks over to the door. She flings the door open but stops under the threshold. There's something she needs to ask and the moment is now, so Emma turns her head over her shoulder and prepares herself for what she's about to say. "Do you – Do you love me?" she waits, but the answer never comes. Regina just stares at her with a blank look plastered on her face and Emma wonders if she's ever been so adept at reading her as she always thought she was. Maybe she never did understand her games at all. Maybe she was just like Daniel, a common soldier that dreamed of being the Queen's favorite knight, her_ White Knight_. "Farewell, My Queen." she says and Emma can swear there are tears in Regina's eyes.

**VII**

The carriage's door is about to be closed when Rosalie comes barreling down the main steps and yelling her name. The young page that was about to close the door turns around to see what the fuss is all about and Emma takes the opportunity to peek her head outside the carriage.

Rosalie comes to an abrupt halt in front of her and she immediately bends over, desperately trying to catch her breath.

"Rose, what's going on?" Emma asks as she watches her friend gasp for air.

Rosalie manages to catch her breath somehow and straightens up to look at Emma's worried eyes. "The Queen," she begins, but has to stop again to draw some more air in. "She says you forgot this in her chambers," Rosalie extends her hand out and gives her a black coat.

Emma takes the piece of clothing from her friend's hand with a frown clearly etched upon her face. She was sure she didn't forget anything in the Queen's chambers because she had everything on already. So why would Regina send Rosalie rushing after her just to give her a _coat_?

"Thank you, Rose."

The petite brunette smiles and her eyes fill with tears. "I'm going to miss you, Em."

Emma purses her lips and swallows back her own tears. "So will I."

"We don't have forever," Lord Daniel snaps from inside the carriage and then lets himself fall back on the seat with an audible _'thud'_.

Emma rolls her eyes but then smiles at her friend. "Goodbye, Rose."

"Bye."

The young page shuts the door closed and Emma leans back, resting her head on the top rail of the seat. She doesn't bother to stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks this time but, when the carriage starts to move, she brushes them away to take one last glance at the castle. She sees Rosalie, standing on the first step of the large stairs and crying her heart out. Next, she sees Gertrude wiping at her tears with a white handkerchief, and Thomas, the young boy who had come to fetch her in the kitchens in what seems like a millennium ago.

She keeps looking, searching for something, _someone_. Unconsciously, her eyes move upwards and to the right, until she spots her.

_Regina_.

The Queen is in her bedchambers, standing in front of one of her large windows. Despite the distance, she can feel Regina's piercing gaze on her.

Emma's hand flies to the window, resting her palm against the coolness of the glass. It's always been about the little details with them, those that don't quite meet the eye, and Emma has always known that but, when Regina's hand mimics hers, it still doesn't stop her heart from beating faster.

They hold each other's gaze until the castle is but a mere dot in the distance.

**VIII**

She wakes up to the distinctive sound of rustling. When Emma opens her eyes she immediately notices that she has fallen asleep over the black coat. She props herself up on her elbows to stretch herself but, when she does, she hears the rustling sound again.

Emma eyes the black coat suspiciously. There's something inside the pocket, so she reaches inside with her hand to see what it is. Her fingertips come in contact with something, a paper. Emma takes it out of the pocket and looks at it for a moment. She takes a glance over her shoulder; Lord Daniel is still asleep so she's safe to open it.

Emma unfolds the paper as silently as she can and stares at the two only words written in perfectly neat cursive letter.

'_I do.'_

Emma mentally repeats the words in her head, once, twice, trying to make sense out of them. She is certain that the paper was written by Regina. She has watched her sign contracts and write letters once too many times along the years to mistake her distinctive calligraphy. What she meant by them... well that's a different story.

But then it strikes her. The Queen's bedchambers, Emma's question, the way Regina's eyes had sparkled.

Emma lets herself slump back and sighs. Her eyes go back to Lord Daniel's sleeping form.

'_She swore to kill anyone I love_ _so he has to leave.' _

Emma closes her eyes, reliving the memory in her head.

'_And I want you in it too.'_

Emma takes a hand to her mouth and covers it. She cannot believe this turn of events.

'_I don't – I don't understand.'_

'_You'll be wearing Lord Daniel's clothes, dear. Should the carriage be stopped, you'll pretend to be Daniel and he'll pretend to be you. It's the only way to ensure his safety.'_

"His safety," Emma whispers as tears well up in her eyes. "_His_ safety, Regina?" she allows the tears to fall freely down her cheeks as the memory unravels itself.

'_I betrayed your trust, so you punish me?' and then she sees it, Regina's dark eyes sparkle and Emma finally understands._

Emma opens her eyes and presses the tiny scrap of paper to her chest. "You weren't punishing me," she whispers softly as new tears spring from her closed eyelids. "You were protecting me." Emma lets out a heavy breath and curses herself for having been so blind when the truth was right in front of her the whole time.

'_She swore to kill anyone I love_.._.' _

Emma presses the scrap of paper tighter to her chest as she cries.

'_Do you - Do you love me?'_ _she waits, but the answer never comes. Regina just stares at her with a blank look plastered on her face and Emma wonders if she's ever been so adept at reading her as she always thought she was. Maybe she never did understand her games at all. Maybe she was just like Daniel, a common soldier that dreamed of being the Queen's favorite knight, her White Knight. 'Farewell, My Queen.' she says and Emma can swear there are tears in the Regina's eyes._

**XXXXX**

**A/N: Kay guys, that's it. I hope I didn't break anyone's heart with this piece. I sincerely loved writing this story and I hope you guys liked to read it just as much. I know that, to some, it might be a little difficult to follow the plot since it's full of small details that are of outmost importance to the story. For example, why Emma is so blindly devoted to Regina, how Emma came to be the White Knight, what the ending means and stuff like that. Also, there are some unanswered questions in the story that I left like that on purpose, such as the true nature of Regina's heart. Is she good? Is she evil? Did she love Daniel? Did she love Emma? Or maybe she loved both? I left all those questions hanging in the air so that you could interpret it as you prefer. So, pretty please leave me a review and let me know your thoughts on the story. I would love to know what you guys' interpretation is of all these questions and see if we agree on some! Until next time! xoxo**


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